My Faith

It has been a while since my last post. I have been busy getting reacquainted with x-ray and all of the angles and positioning tricks. Today in a moment of peace I am reminded of a seed that was planted during my conversion to the Catholic faith.

One day in class we discussed the raising of Lazarus. I had heard this story as a child as well as seen it depicted numerous times in movies and stories relating to the life of Christ. This time though was much different....let me explain.

Throughout my life I have always struggled with the idea of faith. As a child I can remember seeing people like Oral Robert and Billy Graham on television. Of course as a child I didn't exactly watch with enthusiasm but I can remember thinking to myself that these must be great men who are so full of Christ that they can heal people spiritually and in some cases physically. We all know that even men of God occasionally fall from if not God's grace then ours. I think it is somehow easier for us to separate people into neat little pockets of us versus them.

Fast forward some twenty years to present day. My beliefs have been challenged like everybody else....how can they not unless you live under a rock. Having struggled with this idea that I am no Billy Graham and during my RCIA class I was always keenly aware the I was just starting on my journey. I remember Christ said that you only need the faith of a mustard seed....I have always assumed that means small because mustard seeds are small aren't they. Why then do I feel that my prayers and my faith goes unnoticed? Am I not "small enough" for God.

With this idea in mind when I chose my confirmation name....I chose Thomas because no matter how many sunrises I see I always need more proof. I always need.....just one more miracle to make me believe. This finally brings be to the point of my discussion. I have also come to identify with Martha.

Who is Martha? Martha was the sister of Lazarus and part of that extended circle of Christ's friends and family who were fortunate enough to be so. In Martha's hour of need she turned to Jesus just as I have so many times in my life. When Jesus said to Martha that Lazarus will rise, Martha responded from her faith frame of reference. She legitimately believed that Lazarus would be raised on the last day. Jesus was asking something of Martha far deeper than this.

In this story as I see it there are three main characters....the first being God. Are we not all Gods creation so then of course God would hold the keys to death and resurrection of both the body and the soul. The second of which is Jesus. We praise and glorify his name calling him our king, bowing before his image in church and calling him our saviour. We know by the bible and by faith that Jesus has the power to heal. With all of this power how could Lazarus not be raised. However if you study this story, there were no spells, incantations, or fervent prayers offered. Who ultimately opened the floodgates to Lazarus' resurrection....Martha. YES LORD I BELIEVE. In spite of grief, natural laws, unpopular opinion and just about everything else. The faith of a mustard seed....AMEN!